You cannot judge a fish by its ability to fly!
-Anonymous

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समस्याएं इतनी ताक़तवर
नहीं हो सकती जितना हम
इन्हें मान लेते हैं ,
कभी सुना है,
कि
" अंधेरों ने सुबह ही ना होने दी हो ":)

-Twitter (@anupamkher)

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There are no traffic jams along the extra mile.

Roger Staubach

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चूड़ियाँ

मैंने लोगो को कहते सुना है, हाथों में चूड़ियाँ पहन लो | इसका अर्थ है कि आपमें साहस कि कमी है और चूडि़यां पहनने वाले हाथ कमजोर है | किन्तु मैं इससे सहमत नहीं | एक भिन्न दृष्टिकोण से चूड़ियों पर उल्लेख-

बजती हैं माँ कि चूड़ियाँ,

रसोई में मेरे लिए स्वादिष्ट भोजन पकाने के लिए,

मंदिर की घंटी बजा कर मेरे लिए दुआ का हाथ उठाने के लिए |

बजती है माँ कि चूड़ियाँ,

मुझे थपकी दे कर सुलाने के लिए,

मुझ पर आशीष बरसाने के लिए |

बजती रहे ममता भरी ये चूड़ियाँ ||

बजती है बहन कि चूड़ियाँ,

मुझे सता कर अपने पीछे दौड़ाने के लिए,

मुझ से मीठी नोक-झोंक में कमर पर हाथ रख धौंस जमाने के लिए |

बजती है बहन कि चूड़ियाँ,

मेरे माथे पर चंदन का टीका लगाने के लिए,

मेरे हाथों में राखी सजाने के लिए |

बजती रहे शरारत भरी ये चूड़ियाँ ||

बजती है पत्नी कि चूड़ियाँ,

प्रतीक्षारत हाथो से दरवाज़ा खोलने के लिए,

मुझे आलिंगनबद्ध कर मनुहार जताने के लिए |

बजती है पत्नी कि चूड़ियाँ,

मेरी पसंद के पकवान बनाने के लिए,

मेरे घर आँगन को सँवारने के लिए |

बजती रहे प्रेम भरी ये चूड़ियाँ ||

बजती है बेटी कि चूड़ियाँ,

मेरे घर को अपनी किलकारियों से सजाने के लिए,

नन्हे हाथों से गुड्डे गुड़ियों संग खेलने के लिए |

बजती है बेटी कि चूड़ियाँ,

ससुराल जाते हुए छुप कर आँसू पोंछेने के लिए,

दौड़ते हुए मेरे सीने से लग जाने के लिए |

बजती रहे मासूमियत भरी ये चूड़ियाँ ||

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"Don't live the same day 75 times and call it a life."
-Robin Sharma

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Book Review: The God of Small Things

Puzzled to see another book review so soon!? Well, a book review always doesn't mean that I have FINISHED the book and that too so quickly. It may even mean that I have given up further reading, but as a ritual I am penning down my views.

I found out this Bestseller and  1997's "Booker Prize" winner book at the start of this month on Goodreads here. With a whooping 7343 reviews and 151237 ratings, this occurred to me as something I can invest upon. I ordered it then, and after eagerly waiting for long (including Diwali vacations), I received it a few days back.

I don't know much about the author- Arundhati Roy, but upon reading some of this book I presume she is a great scholar in English literature. If these many people have read and reviewed the book on the planet, there is no second thought for it to be called a masterpiece.

But for me, I could not bear with the flooding number of characters and holding the dictionary in the other hand to decrypt the powerful vocabulary. The South Christian from around 1960s, was what I could not relate to at all. It gave me gloomy feeling. The story hopped from one character's back story to the other. I tried hard to interpret the vocabulary contextually and to understand the characters' perspectives. Amusingly (and to my embarrassment), as soon as I switched to the consecutive paragraph, the previous one was wiped of from my memory. My patience couldn't survive for more than 52 pages, and I gave up. Not only me, I later heard from some other friends that they are also sailing in the same boat as me! May be one day my intellect would grow up and I would again open up this book to finish upto the last page.

Till then, all I can say is, there is a difference between what is the best and what is suited for you.

(PS: the reviews expressed here are based on my personal reading experience, and do not intend to defame, derate or degrade the sale or vice-versa for the book. I am not paid for writing the reviews.)
If you are an author and want your book to be reviewed, drop an email at bookreviews@mansiladha.com.

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The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.

-Vincent Lombardi

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To Tweeples and Whatsapp-ians

Dear friends, friends of friends, and to whomsoever-it-is-concerned, you are likely to be fumed upon reading this post, but I don't mind telling what's on my mind. (Excuse me for the same)

The constant itch caused by a bunch of texts and tweets to me could only be healed by having my say on them. FYI, it ain't moral policing.

In the last few days, I had been observing that people puke anything and everything on social media. In other words, they blindly forward all they receive. How funny it was to read that don't watch the movies of Shahrukh and/ or Amir because they expressed their opinion on the intolerance topic? Guys, do you ever use your mind before forwarding mindless messages? I can't stop laughing at this. How many of those who forward all this, actually know what the root issue is all about?

If you are a Software Engineer like me, and you said something that offended me, then would I say that I will refrain from using the part of application that you have coded (in so-called protest)? Well, absolutely not, I would rather reprimand it the other way. If your Mom unwantedly adds some extra salt to your food one day, would you not eat any subsequent meal cooked by her? In the same way, acting is their business, and expressing opinion- an individual choice. A text message said, we have paid 4k crores to make their movies hit..... Astounded by what I read, I thought you didn't donate the money, it was in exchange of the entertainment that you sought. Ain't it? Negativity breeds negativity.

Flowing with the emotions or bluffing on look-I-am-so-conscious, we unabashedly forward it. On one hand you enjoy sending jokes / negative facts about the country, concluding how ill-fated you are to have been born here. On the other, you pretend to be aggressive on such issues, and be epitome of desh-bhakti. 
One such text stating ills of our country in a rather humorous way had a line- "is desh me pizza 30 minute me pahuch jaata hai magar ambulance nahi." I was awestrucked pondering what's the analogy between a pizza and an ambulance. If you are targeting the governance, then best to my understanding, pizza has nothing to do with the government except for taxes. I am not denying the fact, but the way it is shot to despise our country and government's public image. Neither do I understand where this content originates from and who is benifiting by fooling innocent message forwarders!

It is absolutely fine if you disagree on certain things, but remember: whatever you listen / read to is a perspective, not the truth.

Probably you too must have inferred by now that mass communication and media are the strongest means to form public opinion. How wonderfully does masscomm and media manipulate or highlight an entity / event/ person taking them to the zenith or drop them to their doom. They make for a massive machine to brainwash the human mind, or at the least make them think over and over. Ever wondered, where did the award waapsi and beef issues perish after the Bihar elections; why the Maggi-is-unsafe news popped and prevailed right on the time when Ramdev baba was to launch his own healthy-Maggi, and not in the last two decades; why is Indrani's husband Peter's arrest not as much on the news as it was for Indrani? It may be because now no one sees benefit by editing public opinion on these anymore.  Whenever there is big news in the media, look for the one they are trying to take you away from.

And, your job is to use a percent of the 3 pound organ that is present at the top of your body!

Simple as that?

And as, one of the forwarded text on my phone says-

सोच को बदलो सितारे बदल जाएंगे,

नज़र को बदलो नज़ारे बदल जाएंगे।

कश्तियां बदलने की ज़रूरत नहीं,

दिशाओं को बदलो किनारे बदल जाएंगे ।।
(Disclaimer: I am not paid to write this post. It is my personal view, and not intended to hurt/ defame/ derate any person, platform, nation, culture, political party, incidence or event. I do not mean to criticize or hurt either. Forgive me if it does.)

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Book Review: The One You Cannot Have

I had been following the author- Preeti Shenoy for a couple of weeks over twitter, blogger and goodreads. That's where I discovered this book of hers, read the reviews and felt like giving it a try. The header of her blog reads- "The only woman in the highest-selling league." This impressed me and instigated the urge to read a book of hers.

I ordered it last Wednesday, and thanks to Amazon, it was delivered on Friday noon. The fragrance of new pages instigated me to start reading it the same day. Whoaaa! with my all efforts I read it continuously and finished it on Saturday midnight (that includes sleeping, brushing and bathing!) Irrespective of my eyes aching and floating with drowsiness due to the hectic week, I have broken all my records of the pace of reading this 275 page book. One big reason is that the plot kept me hooked up to itself, I couldn't resist my curiosity for the next chapter as soon as current one was finished.

Characters: 

It has four main characters namely- Aman, Shruti, Anjali and Rishabh, backed by a few supporting ones who keep coming and going throughout. 

Every chapter is narrated by one character, in first person (of course). This style of writing is distinct and new to me, and I had never contemplated such wonderful style. All the chapters are articulated well, unlike other fiction based novels, here one gets to understand each character's perspective as the story moves on.  The beautiful writing skill helped me design a portrait of each of the characters in my mind, as if I am in their world.  All four of them perfectly entwined. I am still able to imagine their chemistry.

Plot:

The story runs flawlessly, nothing exaggerated. I could relate well with their story- one because I am of the same age group as the characters; two, because in today's era such stories are very much likely with or around us. The author doesn't tell anything new, but this is one of the best tell tale of contemporary the world's (to be precise, Indian) love-breakup-family-work-relationship-scenario.

The theme is- there is always this one (or more than one) person in the world who you cannot have in your life whatever may be the intensity of your feelings for them.

To summarize, Shruti and Aman are dead serious about their love and want to take it further (this occurs to the reader as flashback at various points in the story). Due to unavoidable family circumstances, Shruti has to move on and marry Rishabh later. Aman goes to US to recover the heart break plus, for his official work. The strings from their past keep aching their minds and hearts. No matter what, they long for each other, but eventually, for each other they are- "the one you cannot have." Shruti's past haunts her married life when her husband comes to know accidentally about her past. In the meantime, Aman returns to India after two long years where he happens to date an acquaintance Anjali and after a few emotional hiccups, sees a life partner in  her and a way to move on in life. And then...then... don't expect me to uncover the epilogue now!

My Advice: 

If you are a teenager who is supposedly fiddling between frequent crushes, refrain from reading this fiction, since you won't be able to feel the maturity of relationships. If you are aged 24- 34, this book shall hopefully be one of the best things in your hand.

My Verdict:

I rate it 4 on 5 stars. If you have even some emotions, and are/ were/ would to be in a relationship(s), this is a good read! Though this was my first book from the author, but surely not the last one.

(PS: the reviews expressed here are based on my personal reading experience, and do not intend to defame, derate or degrade the sale or vice-versa for the book. I am not paid for writing the reviews.)
If you are an author and want your book to be reviewed, drop an email at bookreviews@mansiladha.com.

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Book Review: What Got You Here Wont Get You There

In the row of reading self help books, I just finished this one which I bought 2 years and 8 months back from now, but never had the courage to pick up then.

I rate this book 3.5 on 5.

This book is from Marshall Goldsmith- an executive coach. And as the back cover of his book reads- "...his one-on-one training comes with a six-figure price tag."

The sub-header of the book title reads-"How Successful People Become Even More Successful!"

This guy trains the upper management of various corporates, not technically but to enhance their leadership and interpersonal skills, promoting them as a better individual- both professionally and personally. In all, he helps them cover up the gaps from being a good professional to a better professional. This books contains a gist of his experience as a coach, his advice, dos and don'ts as a leader. 

The best part of this book is "the 20 workplace habits you need to break" (which I would brief below). However, most of the topics and examples covered in the book are worth and help you grow as a professional. Apart from the 20 habits, the parts that I liked most were about enhancing listening skills, apologizing, showing gratitude, feedback and feedforward. He has also covered various traits of our attitude which hinder us to progress to the next level. I've also written another post- A little less ME, which was inspired by one of the chapters from this book itself. 

The author summarizes 20 of the worst interpersonal habits successful employees exhibit in the workplace:

1) Feeling the need to win too much

2) Adding too much value to a conversation

3) Passing judgment

4) Making destructive comments

5) Starting with "No," "But," or "However"

6) Telling people how smart we are

7) Speaking when angry

8) Negativity, "Let me explain why that won't work"

9) Withholding information

10) Failing to give proper recognition

11) Claiming credit that we don't deserve

12) Making excuses

13) Clinging to the past

14) Playing favorites

15) Refusing to express regret

16) Not listening

17) Failing to express gratitude

18) Punishing the messenger

19) Passing the buck

20) An excessive need to be "me"

After identifying your worst one or two bad habits, use the following process to improve your effectiveness:

1) apologize

2) advertise your plan to change

3) listen

4) give thanks

5) follow up monthly for 12-18 months

6) practice feedforward, not feedback: ask for two ideas for future improvement, listen, say thank you, and repeat the process with several other people.

To conclude, this book is for you if you have the thirst to grow as a professional and realize that there are certain traits in you which must be improved upon contructively to help you go up the corporate ladder. Otherwise, do not go for this book.

(PS: the reviews expressed here are based on my personal reading experience, and do not intend to defame, derate or degrade the sale or vice-versa for the book. I am not paid for writing the reviews.)

If you are an author and want your book to be reviewed, drop an email at bookreviews@mansiladha.com.

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