Lessons I Learnt From My Toddler

My toddler is 17 months and 9 days old as of today. His newly discovered skill of walking all by himself is undoubtedly his reason to rejoice. His excitement for life and every object and creature that he sees is noteworthy.

One fine evening when we took him for a walk, he startled us by chasing a stray dog to the extent of scaring it and finally making sure that the dog disappeared. The walk doubled up for us as jogging.

Unaware of the laws of the universe, he doesn't know that he is supposed to be scared of dogs and not be otherwise, and that they may bite or run after him.

The irrationality the kids have at this age drives parents to the brink of sanity, along with their constant fits and tantrums. But at the same time, their simple actions and perceptions make us learn big life lessons like these...


1. Express yourself. Scream when you want, weep if you feel like. Don't hold back your tears. If it does nothing, atleast it is good for your lungs.
2. Sleep when you are tired, and not when you ought to. Sleep as many times a day as you want, and wake up all perked up.
3. Eat if and when you are hungry, and eat only to satiate your hunger and not to empty your plate.
4. Live life in the moment, don't die planning your future.
5. Learn something new each day, and be excited about what you learn. Be curious about your surroundings.
6. Be contended in yourself and love all those you want. You can't make 6 billion people on the earth happy at the same time.  
7. When you don't get what you want, cry for it, fight for it or in the end, leave it.
8. Celebrate yourself, expect others to join in.
9. When you hear no, make it a yes.
10. Don't care about what others think of you. Let yourself be their problem, not yours! Like I say, tension lene ka nahi, dene ka
11. Take risks, be adventurous and never be anxious.
12. Have faith. Faith that everything will be okay, and faith in those who love you.
13. Don't hold grudges, forgive quickly and move on. Negative emotions must be drained. If you don't like something, move. You are not a tree.
14. Given a choice, choose to be happy. Toddlers find happiness in things as simple as a cardboard box, a spoon or a flying paper.
15. Don't complicate life. Accept that you won't get it, unless you ask for it.

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Overloaded Pandemic

"Sharing is caring, sharing is fun. We can all share together..." These are a few lines from one of the nursery rhymes which my toddler keenly watches these days on YouTube. For kids, it simply implies sharing personal belongings or meals. For adults, we can infer sharing work!

In our society, a husband doing household chores means "helping" the wife. On the contrary, wife doing them signifies it as her duty, a thankless job, that came along with the package of the feras of her marriage. A working husband is someone who earns the bread and butter for the family since ages. A working wife, with all certainty is passing her time. We stay in a society where people frown at the mention of a lady not being able to cook, chuckle on hearing if a man does. They generously use the word "lucky wife" on hearing if the husband prepares evening tea for the exhausted wife. In the same society a child is the Raja beta or Papa's Pari, who is allowed to reject home-cooked food, or bargains eating against extra 30 minutes on iPad. The child learns what he/she sees, of course!

Despite of all this, the societal norms are mutating and a faithful balance is being developed slowly but eventually. The newer generations are westernizing and accepting that the burden of household chores are to be bore by the household, and not the house-lady. Exclaiming at a particular gender's participation in the process is subsiding.

Like many, we are navigating uncharted waters: e-learning and working remotely from home; social distancing is taking away everything. Being together is a huge advantage we have as families right now, but we might be too close to it to see it as a gift. It is a real blessing to have each other in this.

In a nuclear family setup like that of ours, taking care of a 1.5 year old child is not a child's play. They say it takes a village to bring up a child. During these social distancing times, our village lies in our household. A growing child needs a lot of attention, and with parents working from home, its a dire challenge. To be able to understand that mother is not just responsible for changing the soiled diapers and handling a crying baby, while the father is sitting on the couch hooked to the TV, waiting to play with the child. In our family, the father is as good as the mother :) We have divided our chores and very well manage them along working from home for our full time jobs. This is how we #ShareTheLoad !

When it comes to daily chores, for which we as urban Indians used to be heavily dependent on maids and cooks, relationships are put to test. My husband chops vegetables and I prepare them. I handle the tantrum throwing toddler, his father cleans the utensils. When I clean the house, he does the laundry. This is what brings harmony in the relationship, and you see your fondness for each other grow on knowing well how your better half understands you, and the family needs. At first, you are awed to see each other doing all that they have never done. Being brought up in a cozy environment, where your parents did all the chores while you sat studying, or pursuing your hobbies, and later depending on maids, all this comes as a shock. Gradually you get used to it, and that's how you grow old together. #ShareChoresMultiplyLove is the mantra.

We never know when these unprecedented times would end. Amidst everything gloomy and the earth still rotating on the axis of Corona, a pinch of affinity in the family is much needed.

Don't forget to watch how Ariel motivates us to  #ShareTheLaundry.

I will #ShareTheLoad and help in household chores in association with Ariel India and BlogAdda

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